Friday, February 17, 2012

These are my confessions


I buy trigger foods - like Honey Bunches of Oats - because they are on sale and have a coupon. And then I proceed to eat two giant bowls because I want to and not because I'm hungry.

I find it hard to say no to co-workers when they wave coconut puffs of heaven in my face and taunt me with facts like, "They don't even have 70 calories."

I have a bite (or three) of Mark's ice cream each night, even if I just had my own portioned treat (read: Skinny Cow bar).

I bribe myself to drink water ... with Diet Coke.

I occasionally eat overly processed pre-packaged meals because they are convenient.

I sometimes make a 6-cup pot of coffee just for myself.

I reheat yesterday's coffee if I managed to stop myself at cup No. 4.

Sometimes that reheated coffee is the only thing that gets me out to run. That, and the hope that a run will put Miles to sleep.

I miss running 6-7 miles before work and sometimes wonder what I would do with myself if I didn't have a baby.

I get down on myself for not being able to run as fast as I used to. 

I walk around the house post-run in tights and a sports bra ... and I don't care that we have no curtains in the kitchen and my neighbors can see in.

I dream of having plastic surgery to remove the extra skin so I could care even less about my neighbors seeing my bare belly.

Unfortunately, more bare belly means more places off which Denali can lick sweat. I've given up stopping him.

I flip off the dog when he wakes up Miles.

I also flip off the dog when he steals my Weight Watchers Chocolate-Raspberry Ice Cream Bar while I'm trying to give Miles a bottle and feed myself.

Our bedtime routine, the one that's so important for babies, involves a bottle and "Wheel of Fortune." For everyone involved.

I am pretty sure Miles will flip off his kindergarten teacher and tell her to "leave it" and "no face" because that's what is said most often at our house.


I could never be a stay-at-home. I like eating my lunch with two hands too much. Even if said lunch is a pre-packaged Smart Ones.

What are your confessions?

10 comments:

  1. I too have been taking the easy way out and eating prepackages smartones for lunch.... its not the worst option tho, right?! (at least that is what I keep telling myself!)

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  2. I use "taking a walk" as my reason/excuse for going to the gas station for an unhealthy snack.

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  3. Oh Lord there is WAY too much for me to confess in this little comment box :( SIGH.

    Just a friendly reminder, I thought one of your resolutions for the new year was to give yourself a break and silence the negative self-talk???? UMMMM- you're doing great - and I can't imagine a life where you aren't allowed to eat co-workers coconut heaven nuggets - you're doing soooo many GREAT things - find your inner voice that celebrates those things!!!!!

    I'll have a high 5 for you tomorrow!

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  4. I love your honesty. As a not-mom yet, who eventually hopes to become pregnant, and as a now-addicted to exercise/running girl, I already wonder about the time constraints that will be put on my exercise time once I'm blessed with a baby. I love that you write about how you squeeze in work-outs. It's obviously very important to you and you're getting it done (WITH a baby!) You're awesome.

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  5. Love your post. Funny because I just polished off two bowls of honey bunches of oats about two hours ago. I chalked it up to PMS :)

    Running with kids. I have 4 littles...one is old enough to run with me and that is pretty good bonding time. Then again running alone is good "me" time. Both are enjoyable options.

    Work is good for sanity too...generally no one at work actually yells at me...children however do. Sometimes I need reminded of this but in general it has been a good choice for me.

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  6. Umm, I do 75% of these things too.

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  7. hahaha and this is why i love you as a blog friend. Your confessions are awesome and i do or would do the same things. confessions: I never ever brush my hair in the morning. I'm too lazy. I either just put it in a ponytail or attempt to kind of straighten it enough to deem it acceptable. happy weekend!

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  8. Confession-if my husband isn't home all my meals are eaten out of the package. Plus the best dinner in that case is either ice cream or chocolate chip cookie dough. Not that I don't eat those things when he's around too, but something so satisfying about eating them in all their glory with a spoon in front of the tv. I know, ridiculous!

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  9. Is there a chance we were separated at birth? I swear I could've written this post nearly verbatim. Your confessions are awesome, and they are what make you awesome.

    My confession: I've been rationalizing eating pre-portioned cookie dough out of the freezer with the thought that I burn an extra 500 calories a day breastfeeding. Also, sometimes I use Charlotte as a prop for the latest Lisbeth Salander novel so I can read while I nurse her (multi-tasking rocks).

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  10. I loved these. You're hilarious.

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