Alert the troops. Put the National Guard on stand-by. Call for back-up.
I am teetering on the edge of binge cliff. I am not just walking close to it, indulging an innocent craving or two along the way. No. No, today I found myself wanting to put my hand into a 5-gallon bucket of Pretzel M&Ms, shoveling the tasty bits into my mouth until there were no more. And when I say shovel, I mean SHOVEL.
It all started this morning, about 11:15, when I had the urge to eat my lunch. I am not sure if it was actual hunger prompting my desire or the fact that I was freezing in the office and the thought of hot soup was as appealing as Curtis Stone making me dinner. I tried to gauge the feeling but ended up warming my soup and healthified Tuna Melt Pie at 11:30. On one condition: I couldn't eat my Triple Chocolate Chunk Vitatop until at least 12:30 p.m.
I ate it at 11:50 a.m.
At 12:30 p.m., when I was supposed to eat my Vitatop, I ate a fruit leather that I found in my emergency snack stash and a mini Twix someone left on my desk. Just because. Afraid that the mini Larabars and almonds would be next out of sure mania, I headed out for a break. An hour out of the office = no chance to eat. Plus, I needed a fall coat.
As I drove to Kohl's, my mind went from lattes to McDonald's ice cream cones to those dang Pretzel M&Ms. What. The. Heck. Was. Up?!? Thankfully, I was distracted by the racks filled with cute sweaters, tunics and other items that would look so cute hanging in my closet. I found a jacket and headed to checkout. I looked at my phone - I still had a good 20 minutes before I needed to go back to work. I could head to Walmart for some facial cleansing wipes.
Big mistake. Big. Huge.
Sure, I got my wipes but on my way to find them, I also found the candy aisle. White chocolate Reese Cups and Twix bars and Whoppers. Oh, and the devil in a candy coating: Pretzel M&Ms. I seriously thought about saying, "Eff it. I am going to go ballistic today and will worry about it all tomorrow."
I stood there for a minute, letting the idea weigh on me (literally) when I decided that it was not, in fact, something worth pursuing. I would need a fix, though, and I opted for Baskin Robbins sugar-free hard candy in Pralines 'n' Cream.
Each candy has 10 calories. Just 10. And one would certainly be enough, especially if I paired it with a zero-calorie SoBe Lifewater (Blackcherry Dragonfruit, if you were curious). Flavor on top of flavor ... without busting a gut.
Of course, my little solution had to come with a $1 off coupon for a Baskin Robbins cone. Thanks, Universe.