Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Last chance for love

Workout: 3.5-mile run

Yesterday, Denali and I had the distinct honor of waiting for the dishwasher repairman. Jerry - that was his name - was supposed to come anywhere between 8 and 10 a.m., which usually means, "I'll show up at 9:59 and make you late for work."

While we were lucky enough that Jerry came at 9:10 (to tell us that the dishwasher was clogged with debris), our chances of a walk or run were shot. We watched "Good Morning America," lifted weights and made breakfast. We stared out the window, blinds open, and felt envy as runners flew by down the sidewalk. We wanted to be out there. We wanted to be doing that.

And it's funny that I felt those pangs of jealousy yesterday because I had no desire to go out there this morning. But I am who I am, and I managed to get out there with the hope of doing 3 miles.

With the first step, I was feeling regret. My calves were sore (I have no idea why) and the muscle/tendon/ligament strain on the sides of my growing belly was evident. I didn't want to do it. I just didn't. And just after 1 mile, I began to wonder whether this run - this crappy run - was an indication that it should be my last. No big decision. No fanfare. No last hurrah. One last run at the end of my 20th week.

I was beginning to write the end when Denali began to do this thing, this thing that usually annoys the bejeebus out of me. He slowed down to a prance, nearly getting in front of me, so that he can touch his nose to my hand. It always makes you look directly at him, right in his bi-colored eyes, so you can see that he is having a great time. His eyes glow, his mouth makes a doggy smile. The joy is impossible to deny.

And so he did this morning, nudging my hand with his snout. He smiled and pushed me along. It was as if he was telling me, "Mama, you got this. We like this. We can do this." I am such a pushover when it comes to him that I couldn't deny his "encouragement" and let go. Let go of the idea that I could quit (very different than need to quit).

It still wasn't a great run. I was tired and the hill at the end killed me. But I did it. And I didn't pee my pants ... I don't think.


  1. I've heard they make a pregnancy support belt that you can wear during exercise - maybe that could extend your running weeks?

  2. I'm glad you don't think you peed your pants! :) I'm sad I didn't win your giveaway... oh well. You'll know when to stop... I'm sure Denali will let you know if you don't. He loves his mama!

  3. Doggies are the best, they always seem to know when you need a pick-me-up!

    I know it's tough giving up the running, but maybe you can still do some of it. I can't remember what month I stopped running, but I did start doing a fast pace walk and alternated with a couple of minutes of slow jogging. It wasn't full out running, but it provided a good fix.

    Just take it one day at a time and really listen to your body :) You'll be surprised how fast time flies and you'll be out there full-out running in no time :)

  4. AhHHHHHHH - what a GREAT post!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think your new life moto after your huge weight loss and lifestyle make over is "you got this!" Glad your running partner came through for you. And glad your pants remained dry :)